Hotel Moderno Poznan: Unbeatable Luxury Awaits You!
Okay, buckle up, because we're diving headfirst into the Hotel Moderno Poznan experience! This isn't your sterile, cookie-cutter review; this is the raw, unfiltered truth, sprinkled with a healthy dose of "that's life" and hopefully, enough info to help you decide if this Poznan pad is your next fancy escape.
Hotel Moderno Poznan: Unbeatable Luxury? Let's Find Out! (Because, Honestly, I'm Still Recovering From the Buffet)
First things first: Accessibility. Now, I don’t need a wheelchair (thankfully!), but I paid very close attention because, frankly, it's 2024, and a hotel's gotta be accessible. Hotel Moderno claims to be, but I can't personally test everything. However, they do list "Facilities for disabled guests" and, while I didn't see it explicitly, I'd hope they've thought through ramps, elevators, and accessible rooms. (Important Note: Call ahead! Don't assume. Always verify the specifics if accessibility is a must-have!)
Cleanliness and Safety: Okay, Here's Where I Got a Bit Obsessive…
Listen, after the last few years, I'm paranoid. So, I was very pleased to see they're taking this seriously. They're singing the right tune with "Anti-viral cleaning products," "Daily disinfection in common areas," "Hand sanitizer", "Rooms sanitized between stays,” and "Staff trained in safety protocol." I even peeped a discreet little "sterilizing equipment" tucked away. Did it calm my anxieties completely? Nope. But knowing they're trying definitely made me a little less jumpy. I was especially glad to hear about "Safe dining setup," and "Sanitized kitchen and tableware," because I was about to get real friendly with that buffet.
And the COVID-19 Specifics are definitely taken care of: "Physical distancing of at least 1 meter," "Individually-wrapped food options". I felt oddly secure knowing about the "Room sanitization opt-out available" too, which is a real sign of being accommodating towards the guests. The "Cashless payment service" and the general avoidance of "Shared stationery removed" are also pretty fantastic.
Rooms: My Little Sanctuary (Mostly)
Alright, let’s talk room. The claim is luxury, and you know what? They’re not lying. The "Available in all rooms" list is practically endless. Air conditioning? Check. Alarm clock? Check (though I mostly rely on my own, panic-induced waking). Bathrobes? Oh, hallelujah! I practically lived in it. Blackout curtains? YES! Bless them, because this girl likes her sleep. Free bottled water? Essential. Hair dryer? Thank god. In-room safe box? Check. Internet access – wireless? Double check (and the internet was actually decent, which is a HUGE win). Ironing facilities? Necessary. Mini bar? Tempting. Non-smoking? Thank goodness. Satellite/cable channels? Fine, whatever. Seating area? Nice, but I only used it for dumping clothes. Separate shower/bathtub? YES! And the toiletries were actually decent. (No, I'm not saying what brand. I'm not advertising for free, okay?)
A few niggles? Yeah, sure. The "sofa" was a bit…lumpy. And the "scale" in the bathroom was probably judging me. I also never figured out the "bathroom phone." Who are you calling? Your therapist? Your travel agent? Me? I'm not answering the phone in a bathtub, I promise. But overall? The room was fantastic. Clean, comfortable, and a welcome respite after a long day of, you know, being a tourist.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: The Buffet That Nearly Broke Me
Okay, let's get to the crucial stuff. The food. The breakfast buffet. This is where things got interesting, to say the least.
They have a bunch options: A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant.
The breakfast buffet… Oh, the breakfast buffet. I took a deep breath. I went in. I conquered. Honestly, it was like a culinary battlefield. The sheer volume of food was…intimidating. There were pastries that clearly wanted to be loved, mountains of scrambled eggs (some alarmingly yellow), and a coffee machine that seemed to know my deepest, darkest caffeine desires. There was fruit, and yogurt. (I’m pretty sure they had a whole honey section.) All seemed too good to be true, and I guess that’s what I should have listened too…
But then, a dark cloud started brewing over my head. I had a feeling something was wrong, and let me tell you, I’m not the kind of person that backs down… It was the next day that my body decided to stage a coup. I was NOT okay. Let me tell you, a "Breakfast takeaway service" would have been amazing if I could have just eaten the things and not suffered, though, I've got to say, "Breakfast in room" would have been even better.
Now, this is not a reflection of the Hotel itself, but… proceed with caution. I'm going back, though. I just won’t let myself go quite so HAM on the buffet next time. I'll try to be more responsible, maybe stick to the "Coffee/tea in restaurant" and skip the breakfast all together. I wouldn't mind grabbing a "Bottle of water" though.
The "Happy Hour" at the bar was a delightful bonus. The cocktails were actually pretty darn good, and the atmosphere was buzzing (pun intended).
So while the buffet experience was slightly traumatic, the general dining options are varied, and the bar is a win.
Things to Do (and Ways to Relax): The Spa… and The Pool with a View!
They've got the good stuff. Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]. I mean, come on.
I spent an afternoon at the spa, and it was glorious. The massage was divine. And the pool with a view? Chef's kiss. I spent a whole hour just floating and staring at the city skyline. Pure bliss. I didn't even bother with the "Gym/fitness." I was on vacation.
Services and Conveniences – Because Sometimes, You Just Need a Little Help
This is where a hotel can truly shine. Hotel Moderno has a solid list of services, and they're all pretty standard but welcome: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center.
The "Concierge" was particularly helpful. They booked a few tours for me and gave me some great recommendations for local restaurants. The "Daily housekeeping" kept my room spotless (a true lifesaver after my buffet adventure). And the "Luggage storage" was a godsend on my last day.
For the Kids:
I'm not a parent, so I can't personally vouch for this, but the fact that they list Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal, is a HUGE plus.
Getting Around: Airport Transfers and the Like
They offer Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking.
My Overall Verdict
Would I recommend Hotel Moderno Poznan? Yes. Definitely. Despite my buffet-related trauma, it's a fantastic hotel. It's clean, comfortable, the staff is friendly, and they've clearly put effort into safety and convenience. The spa and pool are worth the price of admission alone. Just…pace yourself at breakfast, okay? Learn from my mistakes. Trust me.
Booking Offer!
Book your stay at Hotel Moderno Poznan today and receive:
- A complimentary upgrade to a room with a city view!
- A free bottle of local wine upon arrival (drink responsibly, unlike me)!
- **15% off a spa treatment of your choice
Alright, buckle up buttercups, 'cause we're diving deep into the Poznań, Poland adventure. This isn't your glossy brochure itinerary, trust me. This is the real, often-slightly-hungover, always-hungry, and sometimes-questioning-my-life-choices version. We’re staying at the Hotel Moderno, and judging by the website photos, it looked pretty darn chic. Hope it lives up to the hype… (spoiler alert: it's fine, but definitely not the 'Parisian elegance' they promised.)
DAY 1: Arrival, Awkward Polish Greetings, and Pierogi Panic
- 10:00 AM: Arrived at Ławica Airport (POZ). Blessedly, my luggage actually made it. Always a win. The taxi driver? Well, let's just say my Polish is… rudimentary. After a comical struggle of pointing, gesturing, and desperately repeating "Hotel Moderno, prosh-sheh" (please), we were off. The drive felt like an eternity, with the driver blasting some polka-esque music. I didn't understand a word, but I was surprisingly into it.
- 11:00 AM: Check-in at the Moderno. The lobby did look pretty sleek… though slightly less glamorous in real life. The receptionist, bless her soul, spoke impeccable English. Score! The room? Smallish, but clean. Always the priority. The view? Of a rather uninspiring brick wall. Oh well, time for adventure, not staring at bricks!
- 12:00 PM: Wandering the Old Town Square (Stary Rynek). The architecture? Stunning. The crowds? Massive. The smell of sizzling sausages? Irresistible. I spent a good 30 minutes just getting lost in the colourful buildings, and the sheer energy buzzing around felt electric.
- 1:30 PM: Pierogi quest begins! Found a tiny little place called "Pierogarnia Stary Rynek." Heard they served the best pierogi in town, my tummy started to rumble from the thought. The dumplings came, piled high with sour cream and fried onions. Oh. My. Goodness. I think I actually moaned with pleasure. The meat ones were my favourite, but the cheese filled ones were an absolute delight. Food coma imminent.
- 3:30 PM: Attempt to visit the Poznań Town Hall. It turns out I somehow missed the legendary "goats butting heads" show, that happens at noon every day. I blame the pierogi.
- 4:00 PM: Wandered around the Cathedral. A little bit of history to absorb. I have to admit, the sheer scale of it was amazing. The stained glass windows… they were dazzling. Felt a bit underdressed, but then again, when am I ever appropriately dressed for religious monuments?
- 6:00 PM: Dinner at a restaurant called "Brovaria". The beer was good (a local Poznań brew of course) and it was the perfect spot to sit out and enjoy the evening. The food was good. The atmosphere was brilliant. The only downside was the sheer volume of the music - I struggled to hear my friend who had joined me in the revelry.
- 8:00 PM: Hit the hay. Jet lag is a beast, folks. I was out like a light.
DAY 2: History, Haggis, and the Haunting
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast at the Moderno. The breakfast buffet definitely wasn't the best I've seen, but it was free, and they had decent coffee. I made a mental note to seek out some delicious pastries during the day.
- 10:00 AM: Exploring the Imperial Castle. The history of this place is fascinating. It doesn't hurt that it is one of Germany's grandest castles, and it had been designed to impress! After a while I was getting a bit bored of reading about it, so I headed out on to the patio for a photo opportunity.
- 12:00 PM: The Poznań Croissant. I had to get one. It's a Poznań tradition, like pierogi, and it's a flaky, buttery pastry that's delicious. I got mine from a local bakery.
- 1:00 PM: Food tour of Stary Rynek. Honestly, I wasn't sure about this before I booked it, but it ended up being a highlight. It was a small group, very friendly guide, and the food samples. The tour included Polish sausage, smoked cheese, and other delights.
- 3:00 PM: Had a nap. I blame the pierogi and the croissant.
- 5:00 PM: The spooky bit! Visited the "Bamberski Dom" restaurant. We were told that it was haunted. Now, I'm not the biggest believer in the paranormal, but the atmosphere in this place was… unsettling. The place has a long history of being haunted, and I didn't feel like I was alone, especially in the dining room!
- 7:00 PM: Dinner again. We were still full from the food tour, but it was time to dine again. I didn't want to feel lonely, so I kept on eating and drinking. We dined at the "Restauracja Winiarnia". The atmosphere was super relaxed and the food was delightful.
- 9:00 PM: Sleep.
DAY 3: Shopping, Sass, and Saying Goodbye (for now)
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast at the Moderno. The same as yesterday. It's fine.
- 10:00 AM: Shopping at Stary Rynek. Browsing through the souvenir shops. I bought some amber jewellery (because, Poland) and a ridiculously oversized t-shirt that said "I LOVE POZNAŃ" in garish colours. Tourist, much?
- 1:00 PM: More pierogi! Had to get one last fix before I left. This time, I found a "Pierogarnia" that was hidden away on a side street. Even better than the first place, if that's possible.
- 2:00 PM: Checking out of the Moderno. The staff were actually really lovely. The room, a bit small, but hey ho.
- 3:00 PM: Taxi to the airport. Back to reality.
Final Thoughts:
Poznań? Surprisingly awesome. The food is incredible (pierogi, pierogi, pierogi!), the history is rich, and the people are friendly (even if my Polish is still a disaster). The Hotel Moderno? Perfectly adequate. Not life-changing, but perfectly fine. Would I go back? Absolutely. I need another pierogi fix, and I have to see those goats butt heads! And maybe, just maybe, I’ll learn a few more Polish phrases next time. Next time, I'll try to avoid a food coma. Emphasis on try.
Udoncabana Udon Thani: Thailand's BEST Udon Experience? You WON'T Believe This!
Okay, spill it. Is this place *really* as luxurious as they say? I'm talking, like, *really*?
Alright, alright, calm down, Goldilocks. Yes. And no. Let me explain. The website? Gorgeous. The photos? Probably airbrushed to within an inch of their lives. But the *bones*? Yeah, the bones are good. That lobby? Divine. Marble floors that reflect the ridiculously elegant chandeliers. You feel like you should be wearing a ballgown and sipping champagne, even if you're currently rocking yesterday's jeans and a questionable stain on your t-shirt (speaking from experience, naturally).
The *real* luxury? It's in the details. The fluffy towels, the ridiculously comfortable bed (seriously, I almost didn't leave), the impeccable service… Well, mostly impeccable. More on that later. But in general? Worth the splurge. Especially if you're trying to impress someone. Or just escape your own, rather drab reality.
The location. Is it actually *convenient*? I'm not trying to trek across a barren wasteland every time I want a decent coffee.
Oh, bless your heart, I get it. Location is EVERYTHING. And Moderno? Pretty darn good. You're smack dab in the middle of things. Walking distance to the Old Market Square (which is gorgeous, even if it's swarming with tourists at times), the main attractions, and *yes* – decent coffee. Thank goodness. Though, I did wander for a full half-hour once, convinced I was *surely* going to find a hidden gem. I ended up settling for a pretty average (but desperately needed) latte. Lesson learned: convenience wins, people.
Let's talk service. Because a fancy hotel is nothing without... well, decent service. Is it pretentious? Are the staff actual humans?
Okay, service. This is where things get *interesting*. The staff are, on the whole, lovely. Very polite, very professional. But...and there's always a but, right? Sometimes, it feels a little…clinical. Like they're reading from a script. I once requested a late checkout, and the woman on the phone sounded like she was relaying a coded message from the Vatican. Perfectly polite, but utterly devoid of any genuine feeling. It’s like you’re in a beautiful porcelain dollhouse, and the dolls are slightly *too* perfect.
Then again… There was this one exceptional waiter at breakfast. I'd blundered in looking like I'd been dragged through a hedge backward (which, to be fair, I probably had, thanks to a questionable Polish beer the night before). He saw my pain, and without a word, brought me a double espresso and a slice of the most amazing apple cake. That, my friends, is service. That, is humanity. So, mixed bag, I guess. Mostly good. Just don't expect everyone to be your best friend.
The food. Ooof. Hotel food can be a disaster. What's the deal?
Okay, the FOOD. Listen, I *love* food. I live for food. And the restaurant at Moderno? Surprisingly good. Breakfast buffet? A decadent spread of almost-too-many-options, from locally sourced honey to perfectly-cooked eggs. (Okay, *one* time, the eggs were slightly overdone. I survived.). Dinner? Seriously swanky. The chef clearly knows what they’re doing. I had this beef tenderloin one night... Oh. My. God. Melt-in-your-mouth delicious. I’m getting hungry just thinking about it.
But! (There’s always a but!) Be prepared to pay for the privilege. Fine dining comes at a price, folks. And sometimes, the portions are…well, let’s say they're not exactly "filling." You might need a sneaky late-night pierogi run afterwards. Just saying.
Pool/Spa situation? Worth it? I need to unwind. And maybe pretend I'm a glamorous film star.
The spa! Okay, YES. Totally worth it. The pictures on the website, again, are breathtaking, but in person, it's truly lovely. The pool is indoors, so you can swim even when the Polish weather decides to be…well, unpredictable. The sauna is hot and steamy. The entire atmosphere is designed to instantly melt away all your stress. You can actually pretend you’re on some remote, luxurious island, completely ignoring the fact you're still in the middle of Poznan. Bliss.
I booked a massage, and it was genuinely one of the best I've ever had. The masseuse (who spoke perfect English, thankfully) worked out knots I didn't even *know* I had. Emerged feeling like a new person. Highly recommend. Just… book in advance. And maybe don't tell *everyone* how good it is, because you'll never get a spot!
Any hidden fees or sneaky surprises to be aware of? Besides, you know, the fact that everything probably costs a small fortune.
Look, I'm not going to lie. It's a luxury hotel. So, yes, everything costs a small fortune. But, I didn’t experience any *particularly* nasty surprises. The minibar is expensive (duh). The laundry service is expensive (double duh). Just be prepared, and you'll be fine. Read the fine print! Always. Avoid the little bottles of water in your room unless you enjoy a ludicrous markup. Seriously.
Oh! One thing. The parking. If you're driving, be aware that parking in the area can be tricky and expensive. Valet parking at the hotel is a good option, but again, it's an extra cost. Factor that in. Otherwise, just embrace the expense. You're there to indulge! Treat yourself! You deserve it! (Even if you do end up eating instant noodles for a week afterwards…just kidding! Maybe…)
Would you go back? Really?
Hmm. Tough question. See, here's the thing. I'm not rolling in dough. So, it's not an every-weekend kind of place for me. But… yes. Absolutely. I'd go back. I'd save up, I'd put off buying that new pair of shoes I desperately *need* (or, you know, *think* I need). Because despite the slightly clinical service, the occasional overcooked egg, and the eye-watering prices, Hotel Moderno is… well, it’s pretty darn special.
It's a place where you can escape, even if just for a little while. A place to feel a bit fabulous. A place to actually get some *real* rest. And frankly, in these crazy, chaotic times, we all need a little bit of that, don't we? So, yeah. I'd recommend it. JustHotel Hide Aways
